Have you ever auditioned to say “Hello”?

I heard a lovely story tonight on Live at the Apollo, probably a repeat, but what the heck.
Man comes home from a night out with the boys. Has had a few, may 2 or 3 too many. When he gets to the front door and finds his key the deep breathing begins. And so does the audition: the audition to say “hello”.
Not “HELLO”, or “Heeelooo”, just the right word in the right way and with the right inflection.
How many men have been to that audition and failed?